Urban Artifact, Part II: Special Feels Like Fall Edition

November 3, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Urban Artifact, Wow, WTF

Today I had a craving for Mexican food. Well, not “Mexican” food per se. I craved crap. To this end I patronized the Taco Bell located on the Champs-Élysées of the Garden Spot: McGuinness Boulevard. Upon exiting with my bag of unhealthy goodness I noticed two perfectly placed pairs of coordinating footwear atop the garbage can. How they got there is anyone’s guess. I simply found how they coordinated with the building compelling and strangely beautiful.

After snapping this shot I opted to enjoy my burrito al fresco. I took a stroll along Provost Street. There outside the premises of the Newtown Creek Waste Water Treatment Facility— in the shadow of the Shit Tits— I happened upon another urban artifact. It too was compelling but most decidedly not beautiful.

It is rare, gentle readers, that I happen upon something that makes me lose my appetite. After closer examination of the item in question (and shooting burrito bits out of my nose) this is exactly what happened. The burrito was placed back in the bag and out came the camera.

I suppose I should take the glass half-full approach:

1. The parties responsible for the piece of love’s detritus which awaited my delectation engaged in safe sex.
2. Greenpoint— especially its more remote/secluded nooks and crannies— is and has long been for lovers.

WARNING/CAVEAT: once this is seen, it cannot be unseen. Click at your own risk.

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Lost In Greenpoint: Baby Fatty

August 6, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Stuff The Makes Heather Sad

As spied today on Manhattan Avenue. Baby Fatty has been missing from her stomping grounds (Green and Huron Street between McGuinness Boulevard and Provost Street) since July 29th. If you have seen Baby Fatty (who, is should be noted IS micro-chipped!) or know of her whereabouts please contact her people at the above-listed phone numbers. A cash reward is being offered. Thanks!

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New York Shitty Photos Du Jour: Where The Rainbow Ends

June 3, 2014 ·
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Stuff That Makes Miss Heather Happy

We got a nice clip of rain this afternoon, but as the Mister and I were having dinner at Casanova’s this evening the sun finally reemerged. The owner of Casanova’s went outside to take a look. I joined him.

Looking for rainbows?

I asked.

He said that, in fact, he was not but— suggested that perhaps one could be seen to the west. I disagreed:

No, it will be over there (pointing east, towards our splendid waste water treatment facility).

I went around the corner and guess what?

I was right! I went inside, grabbed my camera and hauled ass to Provost Street. The proprietor of Casanova’s was quite amused by this. To wit, I replied:

I know my shit.

If you look carefully, gentle readers, you will notice the faint trace of a second rainbow emanating from the “poop stack”. I gleefully advised the Mister of this discovery, observing:

It’s there because that’s where dreams come from!

Because of course, it is. Closing on a (downright uncanny) note of dreams, rainbows and the Shit Tits, today I completed my first (but definitely not last) Greenpoint-themed snow globe. I proudly present Superfund Me!

A big New York Shitty shout out goes to the owner of Casanova’s for keeping my pizza in the over while I went forth to chase rainbows. I just love rainbows…