Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Here’s Johnny!
From Manhattan Avenue.
Miss Heather
UPDATE, 10:49 p.m.: This afternoon I spied a few more additions.
Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: Made Off
North 6th Street, Williamsburg
Bedford Avenue, Williamsburg
Yes kids, that’s a bigass portrait of Bernie Madoff being rolled down Franklin Street. The man behind the Madoff (and the dolley) is none other than Paul Richard. At last we met! He was a very nice guy— if a bit coy.* He told me this portrait was purchased by a collector on the Upper East Side. Is this true? I’ll leave that up to you, dear readers, to decide.
Miss Heather
*It should be noted that he seemed very happy to know the shit-laden manties on West Street were holding up.
Dung Of The Day: Fun With Urban Blight
FRANKLIN STREET, 12:45 p.m.
I am growing weary of this, Paul.
<3 Greenpoint.
WEST STREET, 1:00 p.m.
Oh…
my…
GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Miss Heather
Boobification Photo Du Jour: Finished At Last!
In two short months my father, Pa Heather, will be coming to town. Although I am very pleased at this most auspicious (and long overdue) development it also means I will be spending a significant amount of time taming the clutter beast that is Chez Shitty and motivating the Mister to finish a few household projects. Like so many of his male brethren, the Mister has issues with follow-through. I try to be understanding about this (after all the man works his ass off) but after some point I have to cry foul.* Today is that day.
EXHIBIT A
This is our bathroom ceiling. After living with clogged bathtub drain for FIVE YEARS (and bailing out used bath water via their toilet) our upstairs neighbors finally pressured our landlord into fixing it. This came to pass almost two years ago. And for almost two years I have had to look at this eyesore while taking a bath.
EXHIBIT B
This is our bedroom. Back in 2003 I decided to give it a paint job. Not possessing the brute strength needed to move our captain’s bed by myself I asked the Mister to give me a hand. I am still waiting.
Nothing irks Miss Heather’s “type a” sensibilities more than when someone leaves something half-finished (or half-assed). So you can imagine my dismay when I encountered the following on Greenpoint Avenue today.
One year is more than enough time to finish this piece.
I thought to myself. I may not be strong enough to move furniture or tall enough to repair my own bathroom ceiling— but I am more than capable of finishing this piece of art work. So I did.
Behold the boobification of Paul Richard! I did this at around 4:00 p.m. today. I was so pleased with the result I autographed my “girls” and left them there.
Is this the end of my boobification project, you ask? Not by a long shot. After walking the streets of Brooklyn, Manhattan, and yes, Queens, my girls were starting to look a little rough. I may not have had the pleasure of being born in this fine city but I have lived here (and walked around the Upper East Side) long enough to know what to do when one’s snack trays have lost their youthful perk: buy a new pair.
Miss Heather
P.S.: All you Sesame Street and art enthusiasts out there will be pleased to know I have embarked upon the completion of The Passion Of Big Bird.
*This is satire. I’m not really that angry.
A Very Special Dung Of The Day: Street Art
I am certain many of you hereabouts are familiar with Paul Richard. He is the guy that goes around putting his signature on stuff and calls it art. I have never been a big fan of his work (in fact I detest it). That is, until I saw this.
This delightful image comes courtesy of my Flickr contact AP. He writes:
…this was on bedford (surprise), i think between maybe N5th and 6th…just leaning against a wall.
Is it art? I don’t know. However I have only the utmost respect for someone who has the chutzpah to touch this mattress. Shit stain aside, I’d be terrified of taking a few friends home if you know what I mean! Otherwise if the former owner of this mattress is reading this, you might want to pay a visit to the Bedwetting Store.
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
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