Spotted In Greenpoint: Hipster For Bloomberg

During my knockings about north Brooklyn over the years I quickly learned there are certain things that mean nothing but trouble. First and foremost among them is anyone bearing a clip board.

Back in the early 2000’s this was a sure fire indicator of a real estate agent. I clearly recall the summer day I was standing with a few friends on Manhattan Avenue when a  gaggle of suit men lead by a woman wearing her best power blazer stopped, pointed at us and— like some hitherto unknown and exotic zoological discovery— identified us to her retinue (bearing clip boards all) as:

the new artistic influx!

The men furiously took notes on their clip boards. I was aghast. Not so much at being identified as such; I probably am just that. What pissed me off was that someone— a self-appointed Jane Goodall or Dian Fosse, if you will— had the temerity to point at another human bring and commenced to give a spiel usually found on Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom or in National Geographic. Simply put, it was dehumanizing.

Since things got sour, real estate wise, most of the folks I see bearing clipboards nowadays are IDT agents going about their nefarious business. And today, June 14, I can add a new animal of prey stalking our (not so) mean streets: hipsters canvassing for Bloomberg.

When I saw this young woman (bearing an XOXO handbag and a satchel reading “Bloomberg NYC”) making annotations on her clipboard at the intersection of Lorimer Street and Norman Avenue I simply had to hang around and watch her go about her business. As you can clearly see in the above photograph I was not the only one who took interest in her activities.

It amuses me to no end how hard politicians (for example: my good friend David Yassky and his sidekick Rami Metal, among others) are shilling (or as they would put it: “reaching out”) to 20-something voters. Inasmuch as I bust my born in the 1980’s compatriot’s chops (usually because they are sporting 1980’s fashion without all the horrible memories that go with it), the fact of the matter is they’re not stupid. I suspect I speak for many— be they 20-somethings, 30-somethings, 40-somethings and beyond— when I say the manner in which Mr. Bloomberg secured his run for a third term was one of the most deplorable, under-handed and revolting abuses of the democratic process I have ever seen.

And no amount of canvassing or “coolness” is going to change my opinion. Period.

Miss Heather