Greenpoint
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Culture on the Cheap
Greenpoint Fashion Watch: Meet Santos
Filed under: 11222, Advanced Life Forms, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Planet Entitlement
Today was a very long one for yours truly. First was the tour of the Shit Tits. That was a pleasure for yours truly. It was when I went to work that things got interesting. When I arrived at the junk shop I heard the strains of death metal. This is not a good sign. To share a trade secret— a Greenpoint Jedi mind trick, if you will— Meshuggah finds its way onto the company stereo for one reason and one reason only: when there is someone present in the store we would very much like to depart. This is a passive aggressive tactic to be certain— but it works!
What I stumbled upon this morning was no exception. When I entered the junk shop no less than four twenty-somethings were sitting in chairs (which are for sale, not lease) conversing like they were in their own living room. Quite frankly I was dumbstruck. Perhaps I am old fashioned, but I cannot for the life of me comprehend how someone— anyone— would consider this to be acceptable behavior. But clearly some people do— and I digress.
After they left (hall raked by the aforementioned death metal— I had polka music waiting in the wings lest it was needed) a parade of people came and went who needed to be experienced to truly be believed. To cite an example: why would someone want a price for a Palm Pilot if he does not know what it is— much less what it does?* I am still trying to figure this one out. Once again: it was a long day. But when I saw Santos I had to smile…
and could not resist asking him about his choice of apparel. He informed me:
There are a lot of weird people here. You have to watch what you wear or they will try to talk to you. Men, we have to watch what we wear… women, they can get away with anything. Have you seen the women over there (pointing towards Nassau Avenue)? They’re CRAZY.
I could not have said it better myself. For those of you who are wondering Santos says J.C. Penney is a great place to buy t-shirts. Do I smell an enticing endorsement deal around the corner— or is it just Greenpoint?
Miss Heather
*My reply:
I don’t know. I don’t work in an office.
Greenpoint Pay Phone Du Jour: Disconnected
Over the last couple of weeks yours truly has noticed the above pay phone (which is located at 1005 Manhattan Avenue) has become rather popular with certain individuals in my community. Or to put it more accurately: one man will use the phone while his buddies (all of whom seem to have a lot of free time on their hands) hang around and wait. This very scenario came to pass last Thursday. They were there for at least 20 minutes. Some may say it takes a village to raise a child, but in yours truly’s experience it does not take a team of buddies to call one’s mother— if you know what I mean. Suffice it to say I found this activity to be more than a little suspicious. Now jump forward to today: October 9, 2010.
It would appear I am not the only person who has taken notice of this phenomenon.
What I find fascinating is how this anonymous saboteur not only saw fit to remove the receiver in its entirety— cord and all— but went to the additional trouble of filling the coin slot with grout. The final “fuck you”, if you will, is the fact he (or she) left the bottle cap with which he (or she) applied said grout on the top of said phone. I’m guessing so as to make it clear this was not an accident.
So it goes on the wild west fringe of the County of Kings: Greenpoint Brooklyn, USA.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Street Seating Du Jour: Greenpoint Avenue
Filed under: 11222, Crosstown Local, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Furniture
Taken October 4, 2010.
Miss Heather
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