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New York Shitty Day Ender: Closure?
I am not going to lie to you: when I learned via Gothamist that Greenpoint’s (and Brooklyn’s) Jell-O Mistress, Victoria Belanger, did not win the grand prize at Gowanus Studio’s Space’s second annual Jell-O competition I got pissed. Big time. Instead of a blue ribbon I’ve been seeing red. Big time. I’m not alone either.
Tony opines:
What a sham! I don’t know what’s worse, not giving the ‘tits’ first prize or having a jello mold contest in a non-climate controlled room during a NYC summer.
Ma Heather states:
I am crushed!
You can fuck around with my emotions six ways to Sunday— I’m used to it— but when you upset my mother I take it personally. The good news is redress/proper recognition may very well be around the corner. Greenpoint takes care of their own. My Newtown Creek Monitoring Committee mole writes:
The committee and consultants LOOOOVEE the jello shit tits. We are talking very seriously about displaying such community responses at the DEP Visitors Center.
Thanks!
Miss Heather
Photo Credits: Carnade and Victoria Belanger
From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Shit Tit
This delightfully abstracted image of our very own waste treatment plant comes courtesy of entropymedia and is dedicated to Victoria Belanger: the woman who should have been the grand prize winner of this year’s Jell-O Springs Eternal Competition. For what it is worth a member of the Newtown Creek Monitoring Committee, the community group which oversees the Shit Tits, was very impressed by Victoria’s creation. She writes:
I saw the shit tit jello entry. Awesome!!!!!! That mold should be memorialized in the DEP Visitors Center. Don’t think I won’t ask at the next meeting!
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Starter: Hey, Ho, Let’s Grow!
Filed under: 11222, Crosstown Local, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
Lest yesterday’s “Day Ender” did not make it clear: G trainers are not a happy lot. There’s a special magic that comes with a “gentrifying” community that is highly educated, under (if employed at all) and pissed off—- waiting for the G train. I recently likened the Crosstown Local to a penitentiary to a friend of mine. I said it was a place where one is forced to contemplate life.
Or in this case, alternatives.
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Represents!
Filed under: 11215, 11222, BAD ASS, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
As you are reading this post the Second Annual Jello-O Mold Competition is coming to pass— where a very special entry, I understand, will be unveiled! Something so sublime its creator, Victoria, swore me to secrecy until the date and time of this competition. She writes:
Hi Heather,
The photos are attached. The competition is not till Saturday evening so please don’t post these until then. You can’t see them in these photos, but the model includes little LED lights that light up the jello eggs from behind. Its meant to look like the digester eggs lit blue at night.
I have done my best to “keep calm and wobble on” with the secret I have been entrusted to keep. But I have to be honest: it’s been damned hard. I have not even allowed the Mister to see what I am about to show you, dear readers. Here it is: a gelatinous tribute to Greenpoint’s most interesting— and curiously beloved— landmark. Yes, I am talking about none other than “The Shit Tits”.
Once I recovered from my initial fit of ecstasy at this, part of our poop plant rendered in foodstuffs, I voiced concerns that the people attending and judging this competition would not understand what has been placed in front of them. No worries, Victoria has that covered! She writes:
I did write my own little essay on why the Shit Tits are so awesome and printed out a little montage of photos of the real deal so people can see for themselves and fully appreciate my jello genius.
I will openly admit that I am more than a little biased here. But— and this is a big but— if the judges of this competition cannot appreciate the sheer genius of this (and give it the award it so richly deserves) then I don’t need them. As far as I (and I suspect a great many other Greenpointers) am concerned these bad boys are a winner. Tits down.
Miss Heather
UPDATE, June 28, 2010: I have been advised that this masterpiece did not get the grand prize. That went to some concoction involving the virgin Mary. Clearly these people have no taste.
At Large In Greenpoint: Spiff
Filed under: 11222, Crazy Cat Lady, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
I just received this the above photograph of Spiff the cats from her very upset owner, Stephanie. She writes:
Heather,
Our 12 year old cat just escaped from our car on Greenpoint and Leonard Street between Manhattan Avenue and Franklin Street (My boyfriend ran out of gas, chaos ensued, cat jumped out the car window.) I am hoping she is still in that area, but she might try to get back to our place on Franklin between Green and Huron. Would you mind posting her picture and a plea for people to contact us if they spot her? Her name is Spiff. She has grey stripes, a white chin and green eyes. She has a zitty thing on her chin right now from the food bowl. She is very sweet.
If anyone has seen Spiff please contact Stephanie via email at: stephanie (dot) lawkins (at) gmail (dot) com
Thanks!
Miss Heather
From The New York Shitty Inbox: Last Saturdays of Summer
This item comes courtesy of a lady named Jennifer. She writes:
Hi Heather,
We have not had the pleasure of meeting, but I do hope we get the chance soon. I am the consulting coordinator for the newly revitalized Greenpoint Business Association and we have launched our first marketing campaign for Greenpoint local businesses who are members. The about section on the web site / blog can fill you in on the details of what the members receive and how they support the community.
It would be great if you can highlight Last Saturdays of Summer and the shopping campaign. Shoppers pick up a shopping Passport each Last Saturday at designated locations – for June 26th it is t.b.d, Black Rabbit and Matchless and then they shop, drink and or dine at a minimum of 6 of the participating businesses and are eligible for a 4:00 raffle back at any of the 3 bars they picked up their passports at. Prizes are from the GBA members and other supporting outside businesses…
You can get the full lowdown on Last Saturdays of Summer, including a roster of participating businesses, by pointing and clicking your way over to the Greenpoint Business Association’s web site. Check it out!
Miss Heather
From The New York Shitty Inbox: Holy Shit
(TITS, that is)
The above screencaps were provided by a woman who knows quality television when she sees it. Lindsay writes:
Our glorious shit tits had a cameo on the show ‘Royal Pains’ recently. It served as a setting for the fourth installment of the movie series “The Trash Collector”. How perfect!
You can see Greenpoint’s most notable assets (and Eighth Wonder of The World) immortalized for all posterity on the small screen by clicking here. Skip forward to ~39 -40 minute mark because, as Lindsay opines:
The show is awful.
Nonetheless it is a red brown letter day in Greenpoint!
Miss Heather
Found In Greenpoint: A Kitty
This item comes courtesy of a lady named Maya, the proprietress of Le Grenier. She writes:
Hi — wondering if any of you North Brooklyners have seen signs for a missing orange cat?
One has just appeared in my garden and she’s definitely a lost family pet — very friendly, cuddly and charming, clean and seems to have been well fed / cared for.
I’m giving her food, water & friendly ministrations but am not sure how long she’ll stay back there (no clue how she even got in, it’s completely enclosed) and I can’t bring her inside (our Galileo is FeLV+) so I’m hoping to track down her owners quickly.
If you know who this handsome lady belongs to— or are interested in giving her a forever home— please shoot Maya an email at maya (at) legrenier (dot) com.
Thanks!
Miss Heather
From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Child’s Play
This piece of Greenpoint glory hails from none other than our waste treatment plant and comes courtesy of Carnade.
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
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