LAST GASP: Help Wanted

Anonymous writes:

Hmm..so I was combing craigslist for food/beverage jobs in Williamsburg, which I periodically do when I’m feeling angry at never getting paid to write, and came across this listing which looked funny:

Commission payout averages $8.00 – $12.00 per hour. Exactly what constitutes a “commission payout”? This is beginning to stink. Big time.

Anonymous goes on to write:

That “hostel” is apparently the same as “luxury” loft rental building “The Glove Factory” on Graham Avenue.

That would certainly appear to be the case. Anonymous (who has proven him/herself to be very resourceful), goes on to ask:

Anyways, I don’t know much about “mixed-use” buildings, and maybe I’m missing something here, but can you have a part-rental/part-hostel building?  Because if I was paying those ridiculous rents, I’d be pissed that part of my building was a hotel.

Your wisdom on the matter will be greatly appreciated!

And no, I will not be applying for that job.

Well, there is no Certificate of Occupancy on file.

But this might be illuminating!

You can read it all here.

I know, you’re just as surprised as I am. In closing, I would feel remiss if I didn’t share City-Space’s description of the Glove Factory Lofts in its entirety. It’s a hoot!

The Glove Factory Luxury Lofts We welcome you take a step back into the heart of Old world Brooklyn with the latest renovated loft building- the Glove Factory. Built at the turn of the century and preserved to its original grandeur, the Glove Factory includes many of her original attributes including exposed brick, timber columns, rod iron doors and wood flooring restored beautifully as if it was built just yesterday. Once inside the lobby, you will be taken back to a much simpler time where horse drawn carriages ruled the streets and the Dodgers called Brooklyn home. Built with modern architectural elements, every apartment features an open style loft living experience including 14ft ceilings, original beams, exposed brick and century old factory doors. Each loft has its own character as not one is the same as the other. Although restored with original historical components, the lofts have been modernized for 21st century New York life. Sound proof windows, state of the art designer kitchens, contemporary living rooms and luxurious baths ensure that every convenience grants you the lifestyle you have earned. Slow down and enjoy a drink at the roof deck while embracing magnificent city views. A fully equipped gym is located conveniently in the building as is a laundry room, bike storage, stroller storage, Fresh Direct storage, business lounge, free wifi and a 24 hour Kim’s International Market.

Just like the good ol’ days when there was a servant class, horse-drawn carriages, state-of-the art kitchens, free wifi, stroller and Fresh Direct storage!

Miss Heather

P.S.: Get a load of this bit of subliminal advertising.