New & Noteworthy: Pink Crack Kills
I have long been of the opinion that the very special place that is Bushwick is sorely under-represented in the Brooklyn blogosphere. Needless to say when I received the following email I was tickled pink to learn the good news about Pink Crack Kills:
I like your blog about shit. I know that you stray to other topics, which is important, but the underlying thread that really makes the posts a part of a bigger whole is shit, and that’s good. I too, have a blog that deals with Brooklyn’s unsanitary side. It’s really the web presence for a zine that I, along with a few friends, publish a few times a year, but one of our favorite topics is used condoms on the streets of NYC. The vast majority of these come from Bushwick because I live there and I’m pretty sure we have more used condoms per capita than any other neighborhood in the 5 boroughs. My eyes however, are always open and my camera always ready, so Williamsburg and the ever-elusive Manhattan street condom show up whenever I see them… So I guess what I’m trying to say is check us out.
Jonathan W. Smith, C.E.O. pinkcrackkills.com
Check them out I did. Not only did I find some of the promised used prophylactics but gems such as the photograph gracing the beginning of this post were also awaiting my delectation. Congratulations Bushwick, you have finally gotten the web presence you so richly deserve. Check it out!
Miss Heather
Found In East Williamsburg
Hmm… I wonder what that round thing is? I think I’ll go over and get a closer look.
If anyone out there is missing an asshole no worries, I found it on Varet between Bogart and White Street. You might want to tote along a little Charmin. He (or she) looks a little “soiled”.
Miss Heather
A Very Special Dung of The Day
(Or: Queens Crap)
My buddy over at Queens Crap (who was kind enough to send me this lovely find) opines:
My initial reaction–sort of round, shiny pellets of roughly medium-blueberry size–is rabbit. It doesn’t look like carnivore–raccoons, et al produce something that looks like cat crap, which is something that you’re all too familiar with. It’s not goose, which looks kind of like soggy, greenish Tater Tots.
And with that sidewalk and fence shadow suggesting an urban area, the color, and my impression of size, it’s not deer.
So, rabbit leads for now.
Indeed. It looks like the Easter bunny came early over in Maspeth!*
Miss Heather
P.S.: Special thanks goes out to my buddy Crappy for sharing this find. We make a great turd tag team!
*And Bushwick too for that matter.
Greenwick Photos Du Jour: The Word On The Street
Lorimer Street
Norman Avenue
Jewel Street
Meeker Avenue
Vandervoort Avenue
Powers Street
Grand Street
Meserole Street
White Street
Cook Street
Miss Heather
East Williamsburg Photos Du Jour: Spring Is In The Air!
Maspeth Avenue
Grand Street
Scholes Street
Bogart Street
Cook Street
Miss Heather
Calling All Shittites: Contributors & Tips Wanted
Filed under: Bed-Stuy, Brooklyn, Bushwick, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, New York City, Sunnyside, Williamsburg
Now that my life has resumed some sense of normalcy (or at least as close as it gets with yours truly) I can finally get around to doing a few things I’ve been meaing to do but have gotten lost in the shuffle. Soliciting tips and contributors is foremost among these things.
Over the last few months I have increasingly come to the opinion that New York Shitty would be augmented with the addition of some other, new “voices”. Recent events (such as the untimely passing of Bob Guskind and the impending demise of the Greenpoint Courier) and my growing acceptance of the fact that I am only one person have made me realize that expanding the content on this site and providing a large forum are much more important than I had previously thought.
So here’s the deal: if you are interested in being a contributor to this site please email me at missheather (at) thatgreenpointblog (dot) com. But before closing this post I would like to make my criteria/preferences/”plan” known:
1. I do not consider New York Shitty to be exclusively a “place blog”. However, there are some geographical areas I tend to focus on more than others: Greenpoint (obviously), Williamsburg, East Williamsburg, Bushwick, southwestern Queens and to a more limited extent: Bedford Stuyvesant and the East Village. Here’s a map to give you a general idea of what/where I am talking about.
The previous having been written I want to make it clear that I am open to material from outside this area. I simply do not want it to override the north Brooklyn-centric nature of this site.
2. What kind of content am I looking for? I’m pretty open to suggestions. One thing I would really like to have happen is feature an adoptable pet once a week. If this sounds like something you are interested in doing, let me know. Otherwise I want to make it clear what I do not want: schmaltz. If you are going to write about your children it better be fucking good. Family Circus (and its ilk) put me in a blind rage. It also goes without saying that racist, sexist, classist, anti-Semitic, homophobic material, etc.— in other words hate speech— will not be published.
3. What’s in it for me? New York Shitty is not a for profit site, therefore I cannot afford to pay you. However, plans to convert this site (along with a redesign!) are in the works. So perhaps some day compensation will be involved. For the time being, however, a little publicity and/or link love is all I can offer.
4. Please be literate.
5. Unless you have sustained a serious brain injury or have multiple personalities please refer to yourself in the first person. Which brings me to my final point…
6. Please do not be insane. The world wide web has enough crazy people posting crazed missives on it already. I have no intention of adding to this problem.
This is pretty much all I can think of. I want to leave the possibilities for this site as open as possible.
Thanks and I look forward to hearing from you.
Miss Heather
Map Image Credit: Google Maps
Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: Fire Hydrant Cavalcade
Evergreen Avenue, East Williamsburg/Bushwick.
Powers Street, Williamsburg.
Driggs Avenue, Williamsburg.
Java Street, Greenpoint.
India Street, Greenpoint.
Miss Heather
Divine Dog Shit Intervention: Bushwick Style
Filed under: Brooklyn, Bum Shit, Bushwick, Dog Shit, Dog Shit Signage, Dung of the Day, Other Shit
Churches give me the creeps. The tradition in many faiths is religion runs along matriarchal lines. My father is an avowed atheist, my mother was raised Methodist. My grandmother (my mother’s mother) tried to inculcate the Calvinist vision into my person.
It failed miserably. Probably because I do want to slave for a salvation I will probably not achieve. If god has already elected his own why should I bother? Besides, the Sunday School classes were downright stupid.*
In the spirit of good faith (and acknowledging the arguments set forth on both sides)— I reached a moral compromise: agnostic. But when I witnessed what I saw on George Street yesterday it made my agnosticism shudder with self-loathing Calvinistic doubt.
This is the Cathedral of Joy. It may not look very joyous but it is indeed a church and its mission is to save souls…
and fight dog shit.
This is a church. Have some respect for the house of the Lord. Please (unintelligible) or curb your dog. Thank you.
I found two turds and a pair of pink panties in front of this establishment. Across the street was another matter.
Thirteen turds. One for each apostle plus one. A veritable Last Supper of dog shit (Judas Iscariot included)!
My conclusion: the fear of/hand of god is motivating dog owners to take their shit elsewhere. Unfortunately in this case it is across the street.
But it is a start!
Perhaps the City of New York will take heed of this novel tactic?
Miss Heather
*Although it could arguably be good job training for corporate shills: rote memorization and repetition. Methodism makes for good stenographers. Regurgitating what has been said accurately without the onus of knowing what it means. No disrepect to stenographers. You work harder than Methodists do.
Bushwick Photos Du Jour: The Word On The Street
Jefferson Street.
Harrison Place.
Boerum Street.
Bogart Street.
Miss Heather
East Williamsburg Photos Du Jour: Meet The Graham Avenue Meat
Filed under: Area 51, Bum Shit, Bushwick, Dog Shit, Dung of the Day, Other Shit, Vomit, Williamsburg
Meat on the inside…
and WTF on the out.
When Mr. Heather got home from work I asked him what he thought the above-depicted thing was. He said (in his unprofessional opinion) it was vomit from a dog who had eaten sausage with a lot of red dye in it (because he has seen this happen before). All I know is whoever (or WHATEVER) discharged this (one of the most revolting things I have ever seen in New York City— and this is really saying something) should probably visit a doctor…
or an exorcist.
Miss Heather
P.S.: I puked a little inside while writing this post.
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