Happy Easter From New York Shitty!

April 12, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

mccarrenbunny

Mister Heather took this great photograph of a not-so-rascally rabbit getting a little play time in McCarren Park recently. Follows is a slide show I compiled of some shots I took in the greater 11222 area to celebrate this Easter Sunday. Enjoy!

Get off the computer already and enjoy the sunshine!

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Street Seat

April 11, 2009 ·
Filed under: Dog Shit Signage, Greenpoint Magic, Street Furniture 

greenstreettoiletseat

You can always leave it to 106 Green Street (which is located immediately next door to the Viridian) to keep things real in the Garden Spot. In the case of the above photograph we have a stand pipe which reads:

Asshole Pick up your Dog Shit

an assortment of detritus and a toilet seat that is a lot worse for wear.

Have a nice day!

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Video Du Jour: Dark Side Of The Moon

April 11, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

naptime

True to form things were pretty quiet yesterday, Good Friday, here at the 11222. The college students (who I presume to be on “break”) have all gone out of town. If Greenpoint had tumbleweeds they would indeed be blowing across our streets.

The only activity of note has been at the sausage shops. Their clientele (in search of a quality kielbasa to celebrate the resurrection of our lord) formed queues which overflowed onto the sidewalks. But this is nothing unusual. In fact, I’d be more worried if I did not see a large number of sausage enthusiasts peppering our fine burgh’s sidewalks this holiday weekend. Although I am a vegetarian I find their presence strangely comforting: they are proof-positive that the unique character of my neighborhood has not been eradicated. Yet.

Good Friday in Greenpoint means different things to different people. A trip back home to be with loved ones for some, a wait at the sausage shop for others. For me it’s just business as usual. To someone else it meant parking his (or her) car in front of Papasitos, putting their theft deterrent gear in place (in this case, “The Club”), popping open the trunk, rolling down the windows and cranking Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” for everyone’s edification. What’s more interesting is no one seemed to mind…

except for my buddy Larry da Junkman. He told me in an exasperated tone that this had been going on (and off) for several hours. I’m guessing he’s not a big Pink Floyd fan. I myself would have preferred “The Wall”.

Hello, hello, hello. Is there anybody in there?

Miss Heather

Sidney Lumet Watch: Lifetime Achievement Follow-up

April 11, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

scadthumbSome of you might remember that last month my good friend Rebecca11222 found a Lifetime Achievement Award (as seen at left) issued to none other than Sidney “Serpico” Lumet from the Savannah College of Art & Design in a patch of Greenpoint shrubbery. If you haven’t you can read about it here, here and here. Well, Mr. Lumet hasn’t stepped forward to claim it yet (and as a result this item currently calls a skeleton wearing a lei as a neighbor) but this most unusual turn of events has not gone unnoticed by a reporter for SCAD’s student newspaper, District. Tandy Versyp writes:

…Rebecca Poole, a stage actor and teacher of the Alexander Technique, was walking her dog, a shih tzu named Fred Sanford in the Brooklyn neighborhood of Greenpoint when she noticed the award hidden in a row of bushes next to the sidewalk.

Just rescued my dog from a junkyard that’s where he got his name, Poole laughed. So I watch everything he does when I take him out. He was sniffing something at this three-point intersection and was about to pee on it, when I saw it. My first thought was, “What the hell?”…

What the hell, indeed. To read the rest of this article click here. Do give it a read. It is tremendously entertaining.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Adoption Event & Benefit

April 10, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crazy Cat Lady, Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

ecc41109

Tomorrow, April 11, the folks at Empty Cages Collective have not one but two events lined up. Firstly, they will having an adoption event from noon until 5:00 p.m. at NYC Pet Supplies:

241 Bedford Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11211

Later that evening there will be a benefit at the Rockstar Bar featuring Nathan Carpenter, Morgan O’Cane, Sturgeon, Zhenia Golov, Hipster Holocaust, and DJ Marvelous Hagler with proceeds going to Empty Cages Collective. Doors open at 9:00 p.m. and admission will be determined on a “sliding scale” (think anywhere between $5.00 – $10.00— either way that’s pretty cheap!).

Empty Cages Collective Benefit
April 11, 2009 starting at 9:00 p.m.
Rockstar Bar
351 Kent Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 11211

For more details about either of these events head over to Empty Cage’s web site.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photos Du Jour: Collect All 10!

April 10, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

blingteeth

From Manhattan Avenue.

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Fashion Watch: Urban Jungle

April 10, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

womanoncellphone

My neighborhood is known for a number of things. Being the vanguard of fashion is not one of them. This is a shame as I have noticed that although a number of things in my neighborhood have changed, there “look” here has not. As crazy as it may sound the tools of the fashion trade for the ladies in the Garden Spot are not too different than what is to be found in Texas. Black leather mini skirts, stiletto heels, UV ray kissed skin, blue eyeshadow, prominently displayed (and often augmented) breasts and hair (preferably blond, but any day-glo shade of red will suffice in a pinch) coaxed into forms that would make Gaudi proud

bouffant

are to my fair burgh what the little black dress and a pair of Manolos are to our friends across the East River.

It should be noted that although there is a general disdain amongst Greenpoint gals for the laws of nature there is one thing they all revere: they loves them some leopard print.

Tiger print.

Zebra print.

Dalmation print.

Fake fur.

You name it: if it once prowled the plains of the Serengeti I can assure you it graces the physique of many a lady here in Greenpoint. Enough so that on any given day the not-so-mean streets of my neighborhood look like an outtake from Mutual of Omaha’s Animal Kingdom. To prove my point I recently grabbed my camera and put on my Marlon Perkins thinking cap to capture some of these exotic birds of prey. Follows is slide show of what I found— along with a few oldies but goodies. Enjoy!

This one’s for you ladies of Greenpoint. I for one think you’re beautiful! NOw if you don;t mind I’m off to purchase a gallon of Clairoxide.

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Inbox

April 10, 2009 ·
Filed under: Dog Shit, Dung of the Day, Greenpoint Magic, Other Shit 

franklinstthumb On April 9, 2009 at 5:37 p.m. Lisa wrote:

walking down franklin earlier and witnessed an old man – stopping traffic – to complain to the cops about “the most revolting thing he had ever seen. outside dandelion wine.” of course hearing this just made me turn back for my phone. either my camera phone isn’t that great, or i’m a lousy camera-phone-photographer, because this pic (as seen at left— ed. note) does not in any way do this massive mound justice. i encourage you to walk by yourself (it’s not right outside dandelion, closer to java.)

I had a little time on my hands so I decided to swing by. It was not at all difficult to find.

bigshit

Here’s another shot that better establishes a sense of scale.

fivebars

Methinks this bad boy gets five stars— or would that be bars?

Miss Heather

Willamspoint Photos Du Jour: People In My Neighborhood

April 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

foursome

coolthing

rosemarys

Bedford Avenue

tourists

Metropolitan Avenue

cooldudeongrand

Grand Street

americanplayground1

theroundtable

Franklin Street

nattydresser

Kent Avenue

cooperpark

Maspeth Avenue

footlong

Manhattan Avenue

Miss Heather

Meet Slumdog Jack

April 9, 2009 ·
Filed under: Crazy Cat Lady, Greenpoint Magic 

jack

This adoptable pup is not only a real cutie, but he also has an amazing story. I’ll let my friend over at District Dog, Rob Maher, fill you in:

…I wanted to thank you for all for the love that you have graced Jack with over the past few months. When I made the decision to pick up a weak, hungry, emaciated street dog with injuries, I never imagined that his story would touch so many of you. I must admit that his will to overcome his situation and the sheer good fortune that he would make so many friends around the world (in person and over facebook) continue to bring tears to my eyes. He is a special pup — and he has some very special friends.

There are two very important things to remember about Jack’s journey to America. First, he endured a grueling 30+ hour journey, spending most of that time in a cage, sitting at customs warehouses in Mumbai and Newark, NJ and locked into the noisy and dark cargo hold of a 777 aircraft (that for the longest period, nearly 18 hours). Jack had never been in a cage before and certainly had never flown or traveled very far from the streets of Mumbai. When Kristen and her parents picked Jack up at the Continental Airlines cargo center, they found a scared but brave and grateful pup who had patiently waited to be reunited with his foster family.

The second and perhaps most important part of the story to remember is that Jack is still not home and still needs one. We and he desperately need your help to get him there. When he was adopted a few months ago, the couple who offered to take him were very excited by the prospect of a new dog into their home. Of course, getting Jack to the US from India presented a whole host of challenges, including potential trauma to the animal, logistics of the actual transport, and cost of the whole process. In my analysis at the time, I decided that the best thing I could do for Jack would be to send him to the US to his new adoptive parents. Though several friends of mine in India had openly requested that they be allowed to adopt Jack.

To cut a long story short, Jack’s adoptive parents have rejected him. They believe now that because Jack is an alpha dog, he will be unable to co-exist in harmony with another alpha in their household. Though evidence suggests that a puppy’s manifestation of alpha tendencies are altered when they are spayed and neutered and that obedience training can also resolve most lingering issues between alpha dogs, the adoptive family is not inclined to try to make this work.

So what did Jack do wrong? Well, not much. Adjusting into a new home — especially one with existing dogs, can be difficult. Jack co-existed well with the female dog in the house but did not get along with the male one. While many argue that that behavior is temporary and subject to comfort and training of the dog, that is not the interpretation that Jack’s erstwhile adoptive parents have taken.

Here is where I need your help. PLEASE read about Jack and his journey and help get Jack settled into a new and loving home. For all of you who don’t know Jack, he is a nearly six month old mixed-breed puppy from near Bandra (W), Mumbai, India. He loves human interaction, is largely house-trained, and has all of his vaccinations in place. More importantly, Jack is a survivor who will make a loving and protective dog if you allow him to.

We don’t know yet if Jack is good around children, so we would need to figure that portion of his personality. We have been asked why we simply don’t bring him back to India, where several families have offered to adopt him. Simply put, the option remains on the table but given the cost, the trauma, and the energy required, I’m hesitant to pursue it .

Anyone interested in giving this amazing lad a new leash on life (Yeah, it’s a bad pun— sue me) should contact Rob at rob (at) doghabitat (dot) org. Be advised that all potential adoptees will be screened by the staff at Dog Habitat.

Miss Heather

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