Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
A Morgan Avenue P.S.A.
Cat owners who live on or around the intersection of Rock Street and Morgan Avenue take note:
a cat poisoner appears to be operating in your neighborhood. It goes without saying if you see someone acting suspiciously around or out rightly abusive to our furry friends contact the ASPCA at the above-listed phone number stat.
Thanks!
Miss Heather
From The Gullibility Files: Student Habitats
As a general rule I eschew posting ridiculous apartment advertisements. My reasoning for this practice is very simple: an entire blog could be premised on the subject and, well, New York Shitty is not that blog. However, once in a blue moon I will find something so ludicrous even I have to give pause. Which brings me to Student Habitats on Metropolitan Avenue (as seen in the above photograph) and the following advertisement gracing their storefront:
When someone says “East Williamsburg” I usually think of the Graham Avenue stop of the L. If pushed I’ll even grudgingly concede the Grand Street, Montrose Avenue and Morgan Avenue stops as being located in “East Williamsburg”. But Stanhope Street and Wyckoff Avenue?!?
That’s kind of pushing the envelope if you know what I mean.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Starter: Why?
Boy I have been pissed off a lot of late. At first I chalked it up to the lousy weather and allergies. Then the weather got better and my allergies abated— only to discover I was still pissed off. I have ceased to think much of it anymore; I have noticed damned near everyone else I have encountered in the Garden Spot lately is pissed off too. Who I am to buck the community Zeitgeist?
Now throw in some serious sleep deprivation due to:
- one of the most obnoxious neighbors you can imagine throwing a party for 20-30 of her equally obnoxious friends*
- crazy people screaming on my block at all hours of the night
- and one of our local watering holes deciding R & B music is best enjoyed at 2:00 – 2:30 a.m. LOUDLY.
and you get one very pissed off Miss Heather indeed!
Now add this to the mix…
and I am ready to blow! What is so rage-inducing about this kitten, you ask? Well, I’ll tell you.
As I was running errands yesterday afternoon I bumped into my buddy Lisacat who, as some of you might or might not know, does a great deal of animal rescue work. She was about to pop into a wine store on Nassau Avenue when I spotted her and her ubiquitous cardboard cat carrier and I asked her what was in the box. That’s when she showed me the above little fellow she rescued in East Williamsburg and something else:
Someone, for reasons only known to him, saw fit to shave him: ear hair, whiskers and all.
We eventually drifted onto the subject of what to name this handsome chap. Lisa suggested that since he has been shorn we name him after a famous bald person. I immediately thought of Ving Rhames, as just like in the movie Pulp Fiction this little guy has had an encounter with someone he would just as well forget (WARNING: previous link is very NSFW) and quite frankly, whoever that person is, I too would very much like to go medieval on his ass.
I will never for the life of me understand why people do shit like this. Really.
Miss Heather
*Luckily I have since learned this was a moving party. No more listening to this woman talk on her cell phone for hours on end— day or night— while sitting in her window and smoking skunkweed and no more excuses for the Mister to walk around the apartment with no clothes on. Hallelujah!
Audience Participation Time: The Ugliest Building In Brooklyn?
Ever since I posted the good news about the L Haus winning the #1 Ugliest Building in Queens my inbox (and incoming links) have been interesting to say the least.
Laura writes:
…regarding the ugliest building in Queens. Love it. Let’s do Greenpoint! Here’s my nominee, the one with the bulls eye. On memorial day my grandson was trying to shoot it with spit balls…
The building of which she speaks— 20 Bayard Street— is, unfortunately, located in Williamsburg. But Brooklyn11211 does a pretty good job of eviscerating it for the pile of shit it is. Halden volleyed the first proverbial spitball at this glass house. So to speak.
Now my buddy over in Queens has gotten into the swing of things. One commenter, Timothy, wrote:
There are some nasty McMansions near me that might qualify as Queens Fugliest. I think we should have a real contest!
I agree. We need a real contest. A Brooklyn versus Queens smack-down of fug infamy— or outer-borough barfchitecture. To this end I have created this flickr group and will get the ball rolling with my nominee: The Luminous.
This colossal pile of crap can be found on Richardson Street, Brooklyn 11222. It is the brain child of Karl Fischer Robert Scarano— who is all too eager to exploit “modification permits” when the mood (and/or money) suits him. The above (and strangely incongruous) brick facade was once a building. As you can see it has been given a new lease on life: the frontispiece and justification for this bigass pile of King’s crap! I for one am very fond of the beam left intact to support the adjacent buildings.
But this half-assed awning (which doesn’t even cover the entire doorway) comes in a close second.
Lovely. As I was taking the above photograph an old-timer painting his garage across the street asked:
Don’t you want to take my picture?
I replied:
Sure. I’d much rather take a photograph of you than that THING across the street.
So I did.
I might end up in the Greenpoint Gazette!
he said. I told him it was a distinct possibility— and that he might become a celebrity. He laughed heartily.
In any case this my inaugural piece of King’s crap to get this bi-borough rumble going.
Hear me, Crappy? Let’s get it on!
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Ender: The A List
Filed under: Williamsburg
From Meserole Street.
Miss Heather
Williamspoint Photos Du Jour: Animal Crackers
Cook Street
Moore Street
Bogart Street
Grattan Street
Morgan Avenue
Harrison Place
Grand Street
Franklin Street
Miss Heather
Photo Credits: A big New York Shitty thank you for the animal cracker conveyor belt images goes out to its creator, The Fictionist.
East Williamsburg Gentrification Watch: Don’t Cry For Me Argentina
FUCK HIPSTERS
FUCKING GENTRIFICATION
(AND DEVELOPERS)
VIVAN Los trabajadores
— ANA ARGENTINA
ARGENTINA ANA
From Meserole Street.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Starter: The Word On The Street
Moore Street, 11206
Cheer up dears!
NO! NO! NO!
McKibben Street, 11206
anus ————————————————————————-
Harrison Place, 11206
Kim Susy dies tonight!
Union Avenue, 11211
I hope you had a good day <3 F8
West Street, 11222
It hurts me when I pee.
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
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