Fedders Friday Long Island City Style: The People Have Spoken!

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On Tuesday, March 3, 2009 I wrote:

No matter how hard I try my wit, gift for gab, whatever-you-want-to-call-it is not doing this stellar example of Fedderism justice. To this end I need your help. Although I realize this has been done before I am proposing the following: you, dear readers, tender LOL speak captions for this masterpiece. These can be left in the comments below or sent via email at: missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com.

If I like what I see I’ll publish the pick of the litter right here on New York Shitty later this week.

Well, things got a little chaotic for me that week so this had to be tabled. But this is not to suggest I didn’t have 49-16 11 Street on my mind. I most certainly did. Among other things I wondered to myself:

Is this building as craptastic in day light as it is at night.

I did a little field research and found the answer.

aviewtoafug

Abso-FUCKING-lutely YES.

Now, without further ado I offer for your Friday morning entertainment piquant observations about this stellar structure from you, the readers.* Enjoy!

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AMOJA wrote:

…I think I may start calling this building the Triple Nipple. Those studs are…well…they’re there.

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Jason in Kew Gardens raves:

This is the most effort I’ve ever seen put into a Friedrich box.

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anonymous opines:

Nah…that’s a cesspool on the roof.

The builder is just too cheap to pay for a hook up to NYC’s sewer system!

Okay, so we have heard about the builder. What about the architect? Another anonymous offers up his theory as to who is responsible for this turd:

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Design by Helen Keller.

And last, but hardly least I want to give special props to lylet (who actually followed my directions for this project). He mused:

I drive over the Pulaski every day – and this building has been testing my gag reflex for months now. While many don’t like the new building across the bridge, at least is qualifies as some sort of ‘architecture’ (and I actually happen to like it). This, however, looks like a Belvedere made babies with a Fedders Special – and out came this cheapo be-nippled eyesore. And did they build the elevator shaft for a few extra floors that never materialized?…

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Indeed.

Miss Heather

*And a whole lotta help from Queens Crap!

Reader Participation Time: Snarkitecture

March 3, 2009 ·
Filed under: Articles of Fedderization, Long Island City, Queens 

The Mister and I do not make it to Long Island City as much as we used to. There are a number of reasons for this. Among them:

  1. The weather. It’s been too cold to venture out.
  2. We have taken to going to Sunnyside and Jackson Heights instead. This is because…
  3. quite frankly we find Long Island City kind of depressing.

Ever since they demolished that beautiful old building at 10-62 Jackson Avenue and replaced it with a shiv-like structure we cannot cross the Pulaski Bridge without wincing. Luckily we had a craving for Italian food this weekend and decided to go to Manettas. As we made our way down the bridge we were presented with a most unexpected treat: 49-16 11 Street.

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This stunning example of Strip Mall Italian (replete with a Donald Judd-esque elevator shaft) sent us into fits of uncontrollable laughter.

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Where do you start with this? Hell, where do you finish for that matter?

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For starters you have the lovely Juliet style balconies overlooking the on ramp of the Pulaski Bridge.

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Just a beer bottle’s throw away from traffic (and perhaps the odd pedestrian or bicyclist).

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Some attempt at symmetry has been made… but not quite enough. I christen this daring new style Art Sucko.

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But no expense has been spared on Friedrichs boxes. This is a good thing. When the dull roar of truck traffic (at all hours) gets to be too much for our intrepid 49-16ers they can crank up the air conditioner to drown out the din.

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The last time I saw something with this many studs on it was in the West Village. (WARNING: previous link is NSFW.)

No matter how hard I try my wit, gift for gab, whatever-you-want-to-call-it is not doing this stellar example of Fedderism justice. To this end I need your help. Although I realize this has been done before I am proposing the following: you, dear readers, tender LOL speak captions for this masterpiece. These can be left in the comments below or sent via email at: missheather (at) newyorkshitty (dot) com.

If I like what I see I’ll publish the pick of the litter right here on New York Shitty later this week.

Your immediate attention to this matter is greatly appreciated.

Happy snarking!

Miss Heather

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