Bushwick Photo de Jour: Bushwick Avenue

January 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Greenpoint Magic 

Stay with them for life…

It should be noted that shortly after taking the above photo I found the following anatomical rendering just down the street at on P.S. 147.

Pee Pee at PS 147

And they say our public education system is failing!

Miss Heather

P.S.: Back on Green Street we Greenpointers have taken up animal husbandry.

Elephant Love on Green Street

No wonder parents are wiling to lie, cheat and steal to get into our public schools.

Greenpoint Photo de Jour: Moon Over McGuinness

January 18, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Moon Over McGuinness

I love this yellow car.

Miss Heather

Great Moments in Crapitecture: 11 Ditmars Street

January 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Articles of Fedderization, Bushwick 

As I was walking down Broadway yesterday something caught my eye. It’s sheer crapitutude even impressed my jaded eye. Here it is.

11 Ditmars Street

Nice fence “Dutchy Construction“! It looks like it was constructed after passing a few “dutchies”. The rope is a nice touch.

Miss Heather

P.S.: Per the Department of Buildings this Bushwick chalet is going to be a two-family building. Um, okay.

Williamsburg Photo du Jour: Cook Street

January 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Williamsburg 

I found this terrific mural on Cook Street (just east of Graham Avenue) this week.

Cook Street Mural

Why the agricultural imagery you ask? A farmer’s market is conducted on Cook Street between Graham Avenue and Humboldt Street (P.S. 257) from July to October.

When I got home I later I realized the farmer in this mural reminded me of someone. It took me awhile, but I was finally able to figure out who it was: our nation’s fearless leader.

Cornholio

Maybe it is the idiotic look on his face? Or it has something to do with his repeated corn-holing of this country (and our civil rights) for the last seven years?

Miss Heather

Disclaimer: This is satire. No offense is intended towards:

  1. the participants in
  2. organizers of
  3. corn cobs sold at

the Graham Avenue Farmer’s Market.

Recreation, Greenpoint Style

January 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

Yesterday I strolled down McGuinness Boulevard and, true to form, it did not disappoint.

Do not bounce beer kegs

I found this sign posted outside the Pit Stop bar. Keg bouncing: I like the sound of that! If baseball is “America’s Game” and Scotland’s sport of choice is caber tossing, why can’t we Greenpointers enjoy a little keg bouncing? Who knows, it might just catch on! (In any case, it certainly sounds a lot nicer than “pig in the bag“.)

Anyone up for starting a keg bouncing league?

Miss Heather

Great Moments in Construction Safety: Montrose Avenue

January 17, 2008 ·
Filed under: Bushwick, Williamsburg 

When I glanced around the corner (from Bushwick Avenue to Bushwick Place) I suspected something wasn’t right. Upon closer inspection my suspicions were confirmed.

Montrose Avenue Special

I did not have Hard Hat Hannah at my side (she is convalescing at an undisclosed location— more details to follow), but I know enough to intuit this is not proper construction safety. There were no permits posted, yet I noticed a bit of yellow paper was affixed to the front door. Let’s go in for a closer look, shall we?

Notice

It’s a hearing notice from the Department of Buildings! Clearly the owner of this building has taken note.

And has seen fit to continue working.

Miss Heather

Sucko in Stucco

January 16, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic, Williamsburg 

One of the greatest pleasures I derive from New York Shitty is the numerous witty and pithy comments I have the pleasure of moderating. This is because I envision his web site as being a two-way street. Its purpose is not solely to toss out missives into the abyss of the Internet; rather, I want people (be they Greenpointers or otherwise) to communicate. With each other and me.

That said, a commenter named “Rexlic” recently reminded me of a wonderful movie by the Marx Brothers called Cocoanuts. For those of you who are not familiar with this film here is the premise via IMDB:

Mr. Hammer (Groucho Marx —Ed. Note) runs a bankrupt Florida hotel. He’ll try anything to make money, even make love to rich Mrs. Potter. But his main scheme, selling real estate, is in danger of sabotage from zanies Chico and Harpo, who also reduce the schemes of a pair of jewel thieves to chaos…

The following choice specimens of north Brooklyn stucco abuse (and very bad taste) are dedicated to “Rexlic” and the brothers Marx. First up, check out this beauty on Conselyea Street.

116 Conselyea Street

You can have any kind of a home you want. You can even get stucco.

More Stucco at 116 Conselyea

Oh, how you can get stucco.

Representing Greenpoint, we have this beauty on Meeker Avenue!

Meeker Avenue Turd

Those of you who are familiar with this area (Meeker Avenue west of North Henry Street) can attest to the many amenities this location affords:

  1. Scenic views of the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway.
  2. UNeasy access to public transportation (unless you like to hitchhike) and other essentials such as grocery stores, laundromats and the like.
  3. The distinction of living in the most crime-ridden section of the 94th Precinct!

But all the previous are trivialities. Who cares about practicality when he or she can enjoy

…the most exclusive residential district in Florida Greenpoint East Williamsburg. Nobody lives there.

Miss Heather

A Sign in the Stuy

January 16, 2008 ·
Filed under: Bed-Stuy, Dog Shit Signage, Greenpoint Magic 

Today I am honored to share my very first piece of dog shit signage from none other than Bedford-Stuyvesant! My tipster writes:

I saw this stenciled plea at the corner of Willoughby and Walworth and thought of you.

Pick up their shit

Unfortunately, as the second pic reveals, the call has gone unheeded (see near green patch, lower left).

Their Shit

Ah well, there’s plenty else to love about Bed Stuy.
Heh.

Regards,
Erin

This looks a lot like a series of missives I found inscribed around a tree pit on Franklin Street a couple months ago.

Don’t pollute our tree

I can attest that (to date) these admonitions appear to be working. Maybe it is the color?

Miss Heather

Miss Heather’s New Pied-a-terre

January 16, 2008 ·
Filed under: Bushwick 

Yesterday we learned how utterly crass real estate marketing can be after taking a sojourn to Central Avenue and Stockholm Street. Perhaps I am simply clueless, but the appeal of bloated McMansions (as either a selling tool or an actual residence) eludes me. In addition to being bereft of any character whatsoever, these edifices are obscene in size— and while this might strike a chord of “luxury” to some, to me it is only that much more square footage for our herd of cats to vomit upon.

As I type away in my little apartment I occasionally lament the total lack of privacy. When I find myself in the position of having to write while the Simpsons (a favorite of Mr. Heather) is being blared at (seemingly) 100 decibels I remind myself of one very important fact: inasmuch as I dislike such “working conditions” there is one thing I despise more. This thing happens to be work. The way I see it, by reducing square footage I have also reduced the number of venues either my husband or our cats can despoil.

Bearing the previous in mind, dear readers, the reasons why I am smitten with the following pied-a-terre (located on Willoughby Avenue), should be self-evident.

Pied a terre

First off, it has a rather large front yard.

Front

While modest in size, it is lavishly appointed with those little things that make a house a home:

  • Extra storage under the stairs
  • A handless mannequin making what appears to be a Nazi salute
  • Ghouls hanging from the rafters and most important of all…

Lucy with a Brewski

Lucy with a brewski.

Who do I make my check out to?

Miss Heather

Greenpoint Photo du Jour: McCarren Park

January 16, 2008 ·
Filed under: Greenpoint Magic 

As I was walking down Lorimer Street I discovered an enormous pile of Christmas trees gracing McCarren Park. Intrigued, I went in for a closer look. That’s when I discovered this.

Bicycle

Looks like one Greenpoint youngster wasn’t too happy with what Santa brought him last Christmas.

Miss Heather

  • NYS Flickr Pool

    DissociationMalevolent and asking for donations20241031_095113Hudson Yards  EDGELooking east-Northern view.Thompson and Broome Streets
  • Ads