Crosstown Local Photo du Jour, Part II: Happy Fashion Week From The Southside!
Filed under: 11211, Crosstown Local, Culture War, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
From the Queens-bound platform at Broadway.
Miss Heather
Crosstown Local Photo du Jour, Part I: Copy-Editing Is Fundamental
Filed under: 11222, Crosstown Local, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
After I took the above photograph (on the Queens-bound G train between Metropolitan Avenue and Nassau Avenue) a painfully cute little girl turned to her mother and said:
Mommy, why is that lady taking pictures?
After they completed a hushed conversation in Polish I walked over to them, pointed to this item and said:
If it’s BROKEN, fix it.
The mother proceeded to look up, read it, and started chuckling. She then said:
My daughter was wondering why you were taking a photo of that…
And I heard her. You’d think with a fare hike these people could afford a copy-editor. I mean, really.*
I replied. She laughed again. And I added:
You have a very smart, observant daughter. I bet she doesn’t write or speak like this.
She assured me her daughter would never employ this kind of shoddy grammar. Closing on that note, I would like to humbly propose that the MTA hire this winsome little lass to author advertising copy for them. Hell, have her do their books as well. All two of them.
UPDATE, 4:53 p.m.: It would appear this post has ruffled the feathers of someone who purports to work in the advertising industry. Or egged-on a fellow wise-ass. Lulu Lemon writes:
Before I proceed I’d like to state I rather like Lulu Lemon. Really, I do. The previous having been written, shouldn’t the subject line read “If it ain’t broke, don’t comment on it.” Or if she (?) cares to be imperative: If it ain’t broke, don’t comment on it! And then there are other abuses of our language such as “simply traverse well know(N) phrases”; semicolon and possibly colon neglect.
As for the use of colloquial speech, I would like to build upon Lulu’s tome and advocate the MTA take the populist bull by the proverbial balls and start employing LOL speak for their advertisements and service notices along the Crosstown Local. This way we— the unwashed masses who ride this train every day— will understand the higher ups at the MTA are being “hep” as opposed to merely incompetent. Given this is the G train we are talking about, gentle Greenpoint readers, I suspect I speak for many of you when I write that such disambiguation is needed.
Miss Heather
*Sorry to be pedantic, but I really cannot stomach this kind of shit. We’re talking about very basic English grammar skills here people!
From The New York Shitty Photo Pool, Part II: Just Go With It
As a general rule I try to refrain from posting more than one work from any given member of my photo pool on any given day. This choice find by WarmSleepy, however, is so exquisite I decided to just go with it.
Miss Heather
Spotted In Bed-Stuy: The Brooklyn Free Store
I was recently asked by Emily Cantrell, the kindly proprietress of Huitzilli, how my job was going. I told her it had indeed gone— somewhere else— but I had commenced writing about some of my choicer experiences and published some of them. The second installment of “Stupid Customer Tricks”, lest anyone is wondering, has (for the most part) been drafted. Now it is simply a matter of proof-reading and refinement. Follows is one incident I plan to incorporate in this tome.
A teenager (while holding up a mini Nerf football) asks:
I can have this for free, right?
To wit I replied:
But of course. This is the Free Store! We get shit in and give it away to people!
I mention the previous anecdote because today during my peregrinations around Bedford Stuyvesant I happened upon an honest-to-god free store.
So what does this establishment have in the way of merchandise, you ask? I went inside to find out! Prepare to be amazed, amused and a wee bit discomfited, dear readers!
New York Shitty analysis: I have to confess that, as a colossal bookworm, I was rather impressed with the vast array of reading material (including Foreign Affairs magazine, no less!). But the Greenpointer in me cringed at the sight of that mattress. A lot. Check it out!
The Brooklyn Free Store
Store Hours: 24/7/365
218 Walworth Street (educated guess)
Brooklyn, New York 11205
UPDATE, March 21, 2011: it would appear this institution has been razed. You can get the skinny from my buddy at Bed-Stuy Blog.
Miss Heather
Greenpoint Street Art du Jour: 10 Faces
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Street Art
From the intersection of Manhattan Avenue & Nassau Avenue.
Miss Heather
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