GREAT MOMENTS IN MUNICIPAL IDIOCY: Southside Style

clusterfuckTHUMBYesterday morning I was alerted by a neighbor of mine that, in their infinite wisdom, the Department of Transportation has removed the “dismount” signs from the Pulaski Bridge. I have yet to verify this in person (I will) but this struck me as being yet another indicator of our fair city’s cow-towing to a bicyclist agenda at the expense of pedestrians. What’s more, it is just plain stupid to have bicyclists (who are apparently now legally sanctioned to go full speed ahead) and people on foot sharing a “pathway” which is eight to (at best) ten feet in width. This is a nasty accident waiting to happen— white lines or not.

I spent a fair amount of my morning fuming over this. In fact, I racked my brain to think of anything our city has perpetrated/inflicted on its citizens (traffic-wise) that could begin to compare to what they have done to the Pulaski Bridge. I came up empty.

Then I took a walk on the Southside. Methinks I may very well have found something worse.

Many of you, dear readers, are aware that I spend a significant amount of time looking down. This may seem to some to be an odd practice but I assure you it has a purpose: to avoid stepping in dog shit. As time has gone on I have found a number of other interesting things on our city’s sidewalks. I have documented them on this web site often.

sidewalk

In the case of Marcy Avenue I present to you this.

sidewalk2

These.

sidewalk3

And these.

Why does this irritate me so, you ask? Well, for starters:

  1. This “bicycle lane” is on a public sidewalk. Bikes do not belong on sidewalks, people do.
  2. If my memory serves me correctly one can get ticketed for riding a bicycle on a sidewalk.
  3. As you can see above the city has sanctioned the use of a public sidewalk for use by bicyclists. Somewhere I hear Franz Kafka and George Orwell cackling their respective asses off.

Follows is a map of the intersection in question to further elucidate my point.

map

I have highlighted the bike lane in question (which is located on South 3rd Street) in yellow. The sidewalk cum bike lane (on Marcy Avenue) is highlighted in green. The more eagle-eyed among you might have noticed that someone walking towards South 3rd Street on Marcy Avenue would have a limited/obstructed view of oncoming traffic (be it petroleum-fueled or man-powered) from South 3rd Street. Here’s a street level view to drive the point home.

south3street

I am not a Southside resident, but I do walk around there pretty frequently. Who do I see walking along this stretch of Marcy Avenue most frequently, you ask? I’ll tell you:

  1. A large number of elderly people. Many of whom are pushing carts laden groceries, some of whom have limited mobility.
  2. Young women pushing strollers or accompanying small children.
  3. Hipsters who have turned on and tuned into their i-Pods.

In a nutshell, people whose ability to dodge an oncoming bicycle— for reasons of their own choosing or otherwise— is compromised. I do not know who thought up this “solution” to the bicycling problem but it is one of the WORST examples of municipal “planning” I have ever seen.

yieldtopeds

In fact, if this didn’t pose a serious public safety issue I’d find the above image downright hilarious. But it is a safety issue. And it is no laughing matter.

I have often been accused of being “anti-bicycle”. I am not. What I am becoming increasingly fed up with is this “have your cake and eat it too” mode of operation our city is espousing. Bikes neither belong on sidewalks nor any other pedestrian walkway. They belong on the streets. Safely. To make this happen entails making tough choices. Choices clearly the leaders of this city are unwilling to make (presumably because they will piss off motorists).

This is a farce.

Miss Heather

UPDATE, 10/30/09 2:00 p.m.: Sure enough, the dismount signs have been removed from the Pulaski Bridge.

nosigns

pulaski2

pulaski1

Wiiliamsburg Election Watch: No Confidence

October 29, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Culture War, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

I suspect I speak for many when I say I harbor no, zero, ZILCH enthusiasm regarding the upcoming election. Even though we, the voters, ostensibly have a “choice” the selection of candidates for the 2009 Mayoral Race strikes me as being tantamount to selecting between syphilis and gonorrhea. Either way you’re still sick.

Which brings me to a “write-in” candidate I discovered at the Lorimer Street entrance of the L train earlier today:

anarchy

NOBODY.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Photo du Jour: Fancy Pants

October 29, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

WHY

From (where else?) Bedford Avenue.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Halloween Watch: Blowing Chunks

I have to admit, I’m pretty darned disappointed with the jack o’ lanterns to be found around Brooklyn this year. That is not to suggest I haven’t seen some cute ones. I have. But living in Greenpoint for ten years has predisposed me towards to grotesque (and downright gross). Luckily enough I found a couple of choice specimens today in the 11211. Here they are.

South 1st Street

spew

This is more like it!

Powers Street

barf

Ordinarily I frown upon illustrated pumpkins, but the sheer ingenuity employed here is truly noteworthy and deserving of a New York Shitty shout-out. Great job!

Miss Heather

P.S.: I suppose no post about puking pumpkins would be complete without bringing back this oldie but goody from Halloween past which hailed from our very own Humboldt Street.

hurlingonhumboldtnys


Williamsburg Street Art du Jour: Back To Nature

October 29, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Street Art, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

natureboy

natureboy2

From North 1st Street.

Miss Heatrher

NEXT WEEK: Day of the Dead

October 29, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

skullsHalloween will soon be upon us. Shortly thereafter will be yet another holiday of which yours truly is rather fond: Day of the Dead. On that note those of you in search something to do this Monday, November 2nd, need not look any further than Williamsburg’s very own El Puente Garden. From the CB1 Yahoo group:

You are invited to El Puente’s Espiritu Tierra Community Garden on November 2nd for our Día de los Muertos Celebration and Garden Fundraiser! The event will take place at the garden (on S. 2nd btw. Roebling & Driggs) from 4:30-6:30pm. This event is free and open to all ages; however, there will be food & raffle tickets for sale, and donations are always welcome…

Among the treats promised are educational games, movies, live performances, traditional food, an altar and art work by Chicano and Mexican artists. All proceeds will benefit El Puente’s community garden which, if you haven’t seen it already, you should. It’s impressive!

Day of the Dead Celebration

November 2, 2009 starting at 4:30 p.m.
El Puente Garden
South 2nd Street between Roebling Street & Driggs Avenue
Brooklyn, New York 1121
1

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Ender: Tge

TGE

From Meserole Street.

Miss Heather

Williamsburg Street Art du Jour: Viva Mexico!

October 28, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

QRST

From Ainslie Street.

Miss Heather

New York Shitty Day Starter: Geoff

October 28, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Crazy Cat Lady, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

Geoff

From North 8 Street.

Miss Heather

TOMORROW: East River Stateless Park & More!

October 27, 2009 ·
Filed under: 11211, Bloomblight, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn 

EASTRIVERnys

This most intriguing item found its way to my inbox courtesy of the artist in question: Geralyn Shukwit. She writes (in an email entitled “not all that shitty”):

Join me for an exhibition of work created before the state cared about Williamsburg. Black and White prints of the waterfront, the streets and people of WillyB from 1998-2000.

Opening night party Wednesday October 28th from 6pm until we fall down or all the prints are sold, whichever comes first!

I have to admit: this sounds like a wonderful way to while away what is prognosticated to be a rainy, dreary Wednesday night. Check it out!

East River Stateless Park (an exhibition of photographs by Geralyn Shukwit)
Opening night: Wednesday, October 28, from 6:00 – 9:00 p.m. (until all the prints are sold or everyone falls down)
Brooklyn Ale House
103 Berry Street
Brooklyn, New York 11211

On a related note: if you’re in the area and find yourself craving some musical entertainment (for a good cause) why not swing by NAG’s (Neighbors Allied for Good Growth) “Raise the Roof” benefit concert at Williamsburg’s own Music Hall? You can get the full 411 about this event (They Might Be Giants is slated to be the headliner) by clicking here.

Miss Heather

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