Greenpoint
Lorven Pharmacy
Culture on the Cheap
Fun With Bloomblight
Filed under: 11222, Area 51, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Recession, Street Art
Earlier today my good friend Crappy forwarded me this story from NY1 about how over-development has left many buildings in Brooklyn vacant and/or half-finished. As if this was not depressing enough this tome goes on to say that despite this glut of over-priced King’s crap, the building continues. It is projected 5,200 more luxury apartments will find their way onto the market in 2010. Clearly the cardinal rule of how to get out of a hole (stop digging) has been lost on these people.
But developer-induced blight need not be such a downer. Just take what someone anonymous person(s) has done at the vacant lot at 689 Leonard Street, for example.
Yes sir, with a little imagination (construction detritus and some wildflower seeds) you can put the “bloom” back in “bloomblight”!
And why not throw in a little ornamental brick stacking while you’re at it? It’s not like they’re going anywhere anytime soon.
I do not know what this yellow flower (located at far left) is, but I really like it.
Behold, Greenpoint’s newest high rise! I wonder if it’s a Karl Fischer?
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Ender: Sorry I Missed Your Party
Filed under: Area 51
Chances are if you are reading this you are staying home tonight. Hey, I don’t blame you. The last time I want to go out to have a little fun is when everyone else is out doing the same: too much noise, ruckus and fuss. What’s more, if you party a little too hard it’s highly probable your misdeeds will be documented and wind up on the Interwebs. Like this guy.
Thankfully we have Sorry I Missed Your Party (where the above gem hails from) to remind us why basking in the azure haze of a computer monitor while drinking alone is a much better way to spend a Friday night! In all seriousness, do give this site a look-see. It is absolutely hilarious— and addictive!
Miss Heather
Thought Of The Day
Filed under: Area 51
If you are going to shamelessly rip off someone’s web site it might be a prudent idea not to add the proprietor of said site to your mailing list.
Miss Heather
P.S.: Seriously, I have had someone email me under the presumption that I am somehow affiliated with this. NOT. COOL.
From The New York Shitty Inbox: A Dead Body On Dupont?
Smitty writes:
hey heather
not sure of the details yet, but looks like they found a body in a construction site on my block dupont between manhattan and mcquiness. detectives here now, coroner hasn’t shown up yet
i didn’t know if you knew, but body was found in a stalled construction site between Manhattan and McGuiness. The site was next door to an acquaintance of mine. I can’t see to remember if he lives on clay or dupont. just didn’t know if you knew.
Miss Heather
UPDATE, 3:15 p.m. Smitty writes:
update on the dead guy- they found a note scrawled on a piece of plywood, and there’s a polish guy trying to read it, there’s five cops all with their notepads out
UPDATE, 7/8/09; 1:45 p.m.: I have it per a reliable source this was a suicide. Apparently the man in question (a Polish gentleman who was reputedly homeless) left a note (on a piece of plywood, no less) and hung himself. His body had decomposed quite a bit by the time it was discovered. This begs the question how many more derelict construction sites in north Brooklyn have been or will be employed for nefarious purposes? My guess: quite a few.
It should also be noted the property in question, 141 Dupont Street (also known as 98 Clay Street) has quite a history of non-compliance per the Department of Building’s web site.
Not that the Department of Buildings has seen fit to actually do anything about this, of course.
The Gowanus Lounge (at my prompting, it should be added) wrote about 141 Dupont Street as far back as March 7, 2007. Robert Guskind also wrote about this site again on April 4, 2007 and June 21, 2007. In the former he quite presciently opined:
…Not be cynical, but one can sense the tragic way this could go. A couple of children will be injured or killed somewhere in Greenpoint or Williamsburg, where there are dozens, if not hundreds of demolition and construction sites with flimsy fences and ones that are open wide enough for a child. Afterwards, the Department of Buildings will finally react….The interesting question is why the Department of Buildings doesn’t devote a couple of hours to the task. We don’t feature these things because we’ve got a fence fetish. Rather, every time we see one, we picture a child, a pet, or the occasional idiotic drunk stumbling into one spots and getting hurt or killed.
Or, as we have learned today: killing one’s self.
From The New York Shitty Inbox: Rebel For A Cause
This item comes from Leslie Ann Murray who is organizing a very special fundraiser this upcoming weekend. I’ll let her take it from here:
100 Bumble Bees Riding over the Williamsburg bridge
Make your own bumble bee costume, grab your bike, helmet, honey pots and lets ride over the Williamsburg bridge. You have to wear a costume or something that honors the bumble bee spirit; yellow and black strip socks are acceptable. Be creative, please come in something bumble beeish.
Why ride over the bridge in a bumble bee costume? because bees are great, I love honey and I eat B pollen, I think it would be fun to ride over the bridge with a group of people in bumble bee costumes and also to raise money for Imani House adult literacy program.
This is not a race just a nice bike stroll. Bikers share the lane with pedestrians on the bridge so we have to be alert to the people on feet.
Bring your cameras, smiles, warmth, beauty, friends and love. If you would like to bring your instruments please do, I’m sure bumble bees love music.
This event kicks off at the Manhattan entrance of the Williamsburg Bridge at 4:00 p.m. Saturday, June 13. The suggested donation to participate is $5.00 (although if you do not have the money to spare you are welcome just the same). For more information (including tips on how to make your own bee suit!) click here and you’ll be directed to 100 Bumble Bees web site.
Miss Heather
WANTED ON MANHATTAN AVENUE: Assassins
Requirements per the above flier:
- Must be 18+
- Live and work within the 5 boroughs of NYC
- You have to be available late at night, in the cover of darkness, on either May 30th or May 31st to pick up your assignments in person
- You must be physically able to make at least one kill attempt per week. That means going out and actually trying to smoke someone just stalking and giving up does not count as an attempt
- Please nobody who still lives with their mamas.
This has “hipster “written all over it to be certain but who knows— it might be a lot of fun! Speaking for myself, it’s a little too much work for my taste so I think I’ll pass. To get the 411 about this open call for assassins check out StreetWars.net.
Happy hunting!
Miss Heather
A Very Special Stimulus Package
Last night I finally got around to having dinner with my good friend Chin. Once we got done with catching up she brought a very special discovery to my attention. And although it really has nothing to do with the usual content of this blog I am going to share it with you anyway. One day she wondered to herself if anyone had seen fit to make a Real Doll that looks like Six from Battlestar Galactica. For those of you who are not in the know, Real Dolls are a very high end and (as the name indicates) realistic looking , a-hem, sexual partners whose cost run into four figures. To make a long story short she discovered these tough times have impacted the mail-order companionship business so the folks at Real Doll have rolled out a very special stimulus package of their own.
Not only do these bad boys (or would that be girls?) come with free shipping but they’re entirely made in the good ol’Â U.S. of A.! Now there’s a bail-out package we can all really get behind.
Figuratively speaking.
Miss Heather
Reader Comment Of The Week
Yes, I know it is only Monday— but I seriously doubt I’ll get anything as choice as the following the next five days. It comes courtesy of stewartparis and pertains to yesterday’s post about a very special billboard in Marine Park. He writes:
Really don’t want to ruin the fun, but I do believe that is a prostate. I prefer corn as explanation.
To add to the educational experience, I am a Physician assistant and while in school, to learn what a normal prostate is supposed to feel like, we were told, the normal prostate is supposed be about the size of a walnut and to feel like the end of your nose, one that you would be suspicious of cancer is similar to the bridge of your nose (firm or even nodular) and an infected prostate (prostatitis) would feel like your cheek (boggy).
I love that whenever I discuss this with patients or friends, people inevitably sample their nose, to see what that feels like. Imagine a room full of PA students with looks of clarification while touching their nose, but imagining it was while their finger was up a strangers butt!!!! Or even better imagine a student during a real exam, not sure about the exam, touching their nose while the other hand is doing THE exam.
Hopefully there are NY Shitty friends across the boroughs touching their noses right now.
Hell Stew, on a dreary day like this I hope my readers are touching a lot more than their noses! Although I have been told massaging this gland creates a sensation that is not for everyone I’d wager a few men might like it. Grab a lab partner and head to the closest office bathroom guys. A brave scientific experiment awaits you!
Miss Heather
From The New York Shitty Inbox: An Open Letter To IDT
This offering comes from a Harlem resident who would prefer to remain anonymous. We’ll call him/her MS:
On Wednesday, 4/15/09, after being asked to leave, your IDT Agents refused to leave my building, located at [West Harlem address here]. They remained in the building after over 25 minutes of being asked to leave, even though I clarified I was an owner. They also refused to stop bothering my elderly neighbors, after being asked to do so. Additionally they refused to give me a phone number or phone numbers to allow me to call a supervisor to assist in asking them to leave. Then I took out my video camera.
There were two female agents, once wore a pink shirt under her coat and the other a gray beret. The agent in the pink shirt said her brother was her boss and he wouldn’t like it if she gave out his phone number, nor could I use her phone and use her minutes. (I offered her $5 to use her phone, but that offer was refused.) Your agents stated I could not make them leave even if I was an owner in the building because someone on the 4th floor buzzed them in. I said if they are guests of that person, they are now out of their apartment, so they need to leave my building. The girl in the beret said something like: Oh it’s your building, yeah right. And I clarified again, that I am an owner in the building and I want them to leave immediately. They said that the last building they were just in someone also called the police and that the police came and said they were allowed to be there. That of course is not true.
After asking the agents to leave for over 10 minutes, I called my super at 1:29pm hoping a man’s presence would convince the agents to leave but he was not available. I then called IDT at 1:37pm @877-887-6866 and they said they could not call off their agents, and that I’d have to call the police. At 1:41pm I called 311 who transferred me to 911 because your agents were trespassing.
They continued door-to-door and I told each neighbor I saw that I have asked these agents to leave and that I called the police. One agent had already convinced my elderly neighbor to bring them their Con Ed bill and I also told that neighbor I had called the police.
Your agents pretended they called the police to report me and then they began knocking on doors on my first floor, and that is when I went to get my video camera. When officers from the 30th Precinct arrived they said they had received my call but had not received a call from your agents.
Here is the video that I put on youtube, as you will see, per request of your agent Sheena (excised) #6706306.
So far I’ve submitted it to Channel 7(“7 on Your Side”), Fox (“Shame, Shame, Shame”), The Consumerist, The Gothamist, Curbed, NYC bloggers/websites (if they have articles about problems with your agents), and the NYS Public Service Commission.
Under § 140.05 of the New York Penal Law, “[a] person is guilty of trespass when he knowingly enters or remains unlawfully in or upon premises.”
If indeed these are legitimate agents from your company, they have not represented you well. This is the third time in a few weeks your agents have entered my building and have gone to door-to-door. Please stop sending your agents to Harlem.
And north Brooklyn too for that matter. This person’s experience with IDT’s “professionals” is not terribly unlike a number I have had. When asked to leave they just laugh. This is not a matter of mere youthful impertinence. It is OBNOXIOUS— and constitutes trespassing. Simple as that.
Miss Heather
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