Ginger Beer Update

As promised The Black Rabbit rolled out its first batch of ginger beer last night. I strongly suspect demand outstripped supply —as I snatched up the last bottle of the stuff (as seen in the above photograph taken on my constantly congested coffee table) at 11 o’clock! Those of you who missed out this week take note: another larger batch of Muscovado Ginger Beer will be in the offering next Tuesday. Mark your calendar!

Miss Heather

From The New York Shitty Photo Pool: Boardwalk In Winter

With the 4th of July just around the corner I imagine a number of you will be heading to Coney Island for a frolic on the beach or to watch Nathan’s hot dog eating contest. In regards to the latter, I certainly hope no public vomiting will be involved this year. I understand there are people who would disagree with me on this, but they are not married to a man who simply had to watch the You Tube video of Takeru Kobayashi losing his lunch. Over and over. IN SLOW MOTION.

In any case I thought this breathtaking photo taken in the dead of winter by Rowan5 was a nice counterpoint to the craziness that undoubtedly will be Coney Island this weekend. Keep cool!

Miss Heather

Hongo Love: One Of Life’s Mysteries Solved

Life has a strange way of unfolding. Just over a week ago I wrote about the latest salvo of visual discomfort the MTA has seen fit to let advertisers inflict on public transportation patrons: Hongo Killer.

My immediate reaction to the above image was as follows:

1. Why are they forcing us to look at people’s feet?
2. This is kind of gross.
3. I wonder if someone gets turned on by athlete’s foot?

As it would happen the junk shop recently got in a shipment of a very special nature. Among the “marital aids”, leather restraints and yes, enemas, was a stack of a magazines called Foot Fraternity. The following is a personals ad from the thirtieth issue.

So there have you. You go to the local pharmacy and outlay $8.00 for a tube of Hongo Killer or you can contact this guy and receive treatment for no money whatsoever. I suppose it is entirely a matter of priorities. Are you are a hongo lover or a hongo fighter?

Miss Heather

Post Mermaid Parade Malaise

Today, dear readers, I am going to take a little break from the Internets, go out and enjoy offline life. Therefore, it is very likely this will be today’s final post— or not. Greenpoint is a rather mysterious place! In any case I will leave you with this, my colleague Blognigger’s piquant take on what happens when you (or in this case, me) puts up a post featuring a photograph of a man gagged and taped to a chair. Enjoy!

Miss Heather

Come Out And Play!

As many of you know yesterday I attended the 2008 Mermaid Parade. Well, as promised here is short film for those of you who were unable to attend so you too can share the mischievous mirth of this, one of Miss Heather’s favorite events. Be advised that this film features some lite nudity and “language”. Enjoy!

Why not also click here and check out the ginormous flickr set I have created for your delectation as well? Breast lovers (and I know you’re out there— don’t think I have not noticed that my photographs featuring topless babes are getting the most hits) will NOT be disappointed!

Miss Heather

Parent Of The Year

Inasmuch as I —a woman with a husband and four cats— see fit to malign the lackluster parenting skills of my fellow Brooklynites I also like to laud acts of good parenting when I encounter them. And yesterday at the Mermaid Parade I found one. I have no idea who this chap is but he is a man well ahead of his time. Unlike Joe Simpson, Michael Lohan or Jamie Spears*, this guy knows waiting until one’s daughter is knee-high to a June bug is no way to prepare her for the rigors of adult life.

Lesson #1: Women have boobies.

Lesson #2: Men very much like to look at them.

This turns that age-old stereotype on its ear; instead of old men giving candy to little children, the children have turned the tables and are giving candy to them.

That’s avant garde parenting for you!

Miss Heather

P.S.: For more fun Mermaid Parade pix and video goodness, click here!

*As in Jamie Lynn Spear’s dad and newly re-christened grandfather.

Photo Credits: Mr. & Miss Heather

Home Sweet Home

After being tossed about on a boat for five hours last Sunday I did what any respectable mariner would do on shore leave: proceed directly to an establishment which serves margaritas by the pitcher. This entailed going Maryann’s D.F. on Second Avenue. Not only are their margaritas quite tasty, but it is a short distance from the L. It has been my experience that self-medicating before subjecting one’s person to the capricious nature of the G train makes the commute go by faster.

But there are other ways to seek bliss. Someone at the intersection of East 8th Street and Third Avenue advocates happiness via self-medication, albeit in powdered form.

Further down the block at 13th Street, “Core Emotional Release Work” saves the day.

I suppose it is easy to feel one’s aliveness when he (or she) is not dependent on the Crosstown Local to get home. I swear I have seen Dante and Virgil milling about the platform at Metropolitan Street on more than one occasion.

Miss Heather

Subway Photo du Jour: Sean Bell

From the Brooklyn-bound platform of the L train at First Avenue.

Miss Heather