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From The New York Shitty Inbox: Tour The ‘Creek For $10.00!
Filed under: 11101, 11206, 11211, 11222, 11385, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Long Island City Queens, Maspeth, Maspeth Queens, Newtown Creek, Williamsburg, Williamsburg Brooklyn
That’s right folks: thanks to the NYCEF Newtown Creek Fund of the Hudson River Foundation ten bucks buys you a trip up our very own Shit Newtown Creek! Those of you who are interested in this very special opportunity better act fast. I imagine tickets are gonna sell out quick!
Newtown Creek Boat Tour(s)
October 23, 2011 10:00 – Noon; 1:00 – 3:00 p.m.
Cost: $10.00 (You can purchase tickets by clicking here!)
Leaves from Pier 17 at South Street Seaport
New York, New York 10038
Special thanks go out to Mitch Waxman of the Newtown Pentacle for not only bringing this to my attention— but it should also be noted he will be the Master of Ceremonies! You can read about what he has cooked up for Open House New York (which is October 15th) by clicking here. Check it out!
Found On Meeker Avenue: Missing
Filed under: 11222, 11378, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Maspeth, Maspeth Queens
Taken June 28, 2011.
Miss Heather
New York Shitty Day Ender: Live From Newtown Creek
Filed under: 11101, 11206, 11222, 11378, Blissville, Blissville Queens, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Long Island City Queens, Maspeth, Maspeth Queens, Newtown Creek
While prognosticated, the rapture did not happen today. Or if it did I was left behind and am ready, willing and able to process copious amounts of photographs and video footage from my Newtown Creek experience. Before we proceed here are some interesting facts/observations:
- Courtesy of a nearby radio station the Kosciuszko Bridge is “live”. In other words when men perform maintenance on it they must be “grounded”.
- The sour mash from breweries which formerly dotted the creek were fed to cows and their milk (which was reputed to taste rather awful) was then sold to orphanages at deep discounts. For this reason the product was called “orphan’s milk”.
- The “product” from our local waste treatment plant is dried into cakes (their words, not mine) and sold on the open market as fertilizer.
- After a week of heavy rainfall Newtown Creek is awash in Coney Island whitefish.
A Bit About Hunters Point (South) Development
Two Words: SHIT TITS!
Our tour guide, Mitch Waxman, explains the provenance of “DUGABO”
The First, But Hardly Last, Condom Spotting of the Day
The Penny Bridge Is Discussed
KAYAKERS!
A Representative from Riverkeeper Speaks, Part I: Waste Management
TEASER/CAVEAT: If you watch carefully you will see the putrefied bloated corpse of a cat drifting in the water.
A Representative from Riverkeeper Speaks, Part II: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About The Shit Tits
In closing I will leave you with this very informative brochure from my sojourn. You can view it by clicking here.
Miss Heather
MARK YOUR CALENDARS: Newtown Creek Boat Tour
Filed under: 10038, 11101, 11206, 11211, 11222, 11237, 11378, Bushwick, Bushwick Brooklyn, East Williamsburg, East Williamsburg Brooklyn, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Long Island City, Long Island City Queens, Manhattan, Maspeth, Maspeth Queens, Newtown Creek, Queens
I almost forgot about this one but thankfully got a reminder from my buddy (and Chairman of the endeavor): Mitch Waxman. Despite the untimely passing of Bernard Ente, the tour guide extraordinaire of this event, the show must go on. And go on it will this upcoming May 21st. Tickets cost $60.00 per person and can be purchased by clicking here or contacting Mitch via email at: waxmanstudio (at) gmail (dot) com. I am very aware that $60.00 is a pretty hefty sum for many folks however, I speak from personal experience that you will get an eyeful (and noseful) for your money. Follows is a slide show of highlights from a tour yours truly took a few years ago. Enjoy!
Working Harbor Tour of Newtown Creek
May 21, 2011 starting at 10:00 a.m.
Pier 17, South Street Seaport
New York, New York 10038
Miss Heather
NYS Flickr Pool
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