From The New York Shitty Inbox: Good News!
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Stuff That Makes Miss Heather Happy
I have just received word that KitKat (as seen at left) is back home safe and sound. Perhaps that wild storm that just blew through well— how shall we say— “motivated” her to better appreciate “domesticity”? She ain’t talking!
Greenpoint Photo Du Jour: Manhattan Avenue Fashion Watch
Filed under: 11222, BAD ASS, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Stuff That Makes Miss Heather Happy
When I saw this woman braving the heat in such magnificent style I simply had to document it for posterity. Of course in the interest of full disclosure it should be noted that I may be a mite bit biased…
From The New York Shitty Inbox: KitKat Is Lost!
A very nice lady named Colleen writes:
KitKat got out sunday morning and has been gone since …she was last seen on Oak street. Please call 646-251-3418
If you have seen this lass, please call her person at the above-listed phone number. A reward is being offered.
UPDATE, July 9, 2014: She is back home safe and sound. Yay!
Urban Fur: Greenpoint Deli & Grocery
Loss prevention specialist and all-around cuteness ninja Ash keeps a careful eye on the candy.
Spotted On Manhattan Avenue: Stolen On The 4th Of July
Filed under: 11222, Criminal Activity, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
This makes two bikes which have recently been stolen in Greenpoint. Hmm…
Crosstown Local Photo Du Jour: Au Contraire
Filed under: 11222, Crosstown Local, Fuck This Shit, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
The dissent here was done via Sharpie Marker— as opposed to yours truly’s middle finger)— but the sentiment is more or less the same. On a related note, Airbnb’s advertising campaign (so as to win over the hearts and minds of New Yorkers) has merited attention from the New York Times. This article regarding the “sharing economy” is also quite interesting. Pardon me for asking, but if money is exchanged isn’t that commerce?
P.S.: Am I the only person who is wondering exactly how many of these depicted Airbnb “hosts” are paying the applicable taxes for and have permission from their landords for engaging in this “sharing”? Anyone?
From The New York Shitty Inbox: And Now A Word From The MTA
Filed under: 11222, Crosstown Local, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic
In an alert sent at 12:39 p.m.:
b/d, there is no G train service b/t Bedford-Nostrand Avs & Court Sq, due to FDNY activity at Greenpoint Av. Allow additional travel time.
I went to the scene to see what was going on (one NEVER has to twist my arm for a chance to talk to New York’s Bravest*). Apparently there is a fire in the tunnel. They have all the entrances to the G at Greenpoint buttoned down pretty good. Those of you who presently require the services of the Crosstown Local G between Bedford Nostrand and Court Square would be best advised to find another means of transit for the time being.
1:53 pm: Folks are being allowed to enter the subway at India Street so I am guessing everything is A-ok.
*I noted that I appreciated their hard work and noted it has gotta suck to wear all that gear on a day like this one. One fellow agreed it was “a little hot”. To wit I replied:
This is swampass weather.
They were amused.
Spotted At The North Brooklyn Boat Club: Butt Tossing
Filed under: 11222, Greenpoint, Greenpoint Brooklyn, Greenpoint Magic, Newtown Creek, Wow, WTF
Last night the Mister and I decided to have dinner in Long Island City. Since the weather was (somewhat) amenable we decided to walk home. As we were crossing the Pulaski we spied signs of activity at the North Brooklyn Boat Club. Intrigued— because, as we all, a great deal of “educational outreach” is conducted at 10:13 on a Tuesday night— we decided to hang around see what gives. Clearly they were wrapping up for the night. And then the Mister saw something interesting. VERY INTERESTING.
This fellow placed an object to his mouth (a kazoo? cigarette?), pulled a drag and proceeded to walk to the floating dock. There he tossed it into the creek. The Mister was flummoxed:
Did you see that? He just tossed a cigarette into the creek?!?
Me: Yes, I saw that. Did you know the North Brooklyn Boat Club was recently awarded Greenpoint Community Environmental Fund money so as to educate bar patrons about how cigarette butts thrown onto the street enter our sewer system and eventually end up in the creek?
The Mister: Really?
Really. Perhaps the point they are attempting to make is rather than putting your butt in the street you should simply go directly to the creek a deposit directly? That way you are cutting out the middle man! In all seriousness folks:
- With “environmentalists” like this, who needs enemies?
- I fail to see why bar owners cannot, will not fund such an initiative out of their own pockets? I mean, it is not like they’re not experiencing a downturn in business or anything. Bars must be doing a nice clip of business. Why else would north Brooklyn have so damned many of them?
- I am certain those who were engaged in the lawsuit from whose settlement the North Brooklyn Boat Club received funding for this sterling endeavor are gonna be thrilled to see this.
Quicklink: News 12
You can get the 411 by clicking here. Yikes!
UPDATE: The following news item has been brought to my attention. (Thanks Amber.)
You can read the whole sad story by clicking here. My heart goes out to Mr. Middleton’s loved ones.
News From The Snow Globe Factory: VANDALISM!
Or: Behind every great fortune lies a great crime.
The last few days have been spent sealing snow globes, cleaning and organizing. When I left one snow globe unattended today— in the privacy of my own home— the unthinkable happened.
It. Was. Vandalized. ONCE AGAIN: VANDALIZED!
We all know that graffiti is a problem in Greenpoint— but with HO scale people? This not only besmirched New York City’s name, but my fair community’s as well. The Greenpoint Gazette has made this quite clear. I certainly hope this was not captured on Google street view! I, as a citizen, will not stand for this shit.
So I took a page from Tony Argento’s book and offered a bounty to my fellow citizens so as to apprehend the miscreant responsible. With a twist— and on a much more modest, pragmatic level.
If there’s one thing I have come to understand about “The Argentos” it is this; they are quite “generous” with campaign donations and local charitable organizations. I call this “spreading the fertilizer”. It makes the land “fertile” for whatever BS they plan to do— or have already done. CASE IN POINT:
But I do not have these kind of resources. So I asked myself:
What creature acts most like a politician/opportunist? Someone willing to say or do anything for the end result— moral scruples be damned— and CHEAP?
It did not take me long to figure it out: Katz CATS!
- First I stole a dollar from the Mister’s wallet.
- Secondly, I “infused” my ill-gotten gains with catnip.
- Thirdly, so as to kick things off, I placed a little— LITTLE— catnip on the floor. Just enough for a taste. I was playing “benefactor”.
Sure enough, they fought over it.
Then I asked my question and waved a catnip-infused dollar.
This is how “politics” works in Greenpoint (and New York City). You can be a slumlord, operate an illegal waste trade business, get busted for it; owe the Internal Revenue Service over a half a million dollars in tax liens and owe $30,000 in fines to the Department of Buildings on one building alone— but as long as you donate “generously”, you will be a pillar of the community and your complaint about someone vandalizing your property to the extent of $8,000 whole dollars— will be taken seriously. Let’s take the following 94th Precinct Community Council meeting which came to pass in April 2013.
Even if you say “SB”. (Instead of BS— The following video is even better!)
Note: the Business Integrity Commission decision of which I included passages was issued the very next month! One has to admire that kind of bald-faced hypocrisy. Which brings me back to the video gracing the beginning of this post. It was shot on August 23, 2012. So, as Mr. Levin was extolling upon what great corporate citizens Gina and Tony are, they were busy operating an illegal waste trade business. In Greenpoint. Among other things. Do the math— and please read this. It is always refreshing to see a City Councilman allocating money outside his own district. When one receives the largess of the Argentos, it comes with strings attached…
But as you see below, gentle readers, it was money well spent!
Update, July 1st 2014: Oh, how could I forget something a reporter from Crains recently brought to my attention!?!
Hmm…
P.S.: No animals were hurt during the filming of these videos. They just got really, seriously, stoned on catnip.
*Monica Holowacz is either an Office Assistant or owner of this company. Either way, I find it very, VERY difficult to believe she had the funds to make a $4,000 donation to Mr. DeBlasio’s campaign. This of course begs the question as to where this money really came from. Anyone?
You must be logged in to post a comment.